


don't let go of my hand (not tonight, not ever)

by byungari



Series: lost and found [2]
Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, they break up, this is angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-18 12:37:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16995126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/byungari/pseuds/byungari
Summary: Daniel leaves.





	don't let go of my hand (not tonight, not ever)

**Author's Note:**

> i posted this on twitter as a ficlet but i'm posting it here too yeehaw
> 
> i added a bit more so its a lil diff from the one on twitter but i hope you enjoy!!
> 
> (i'm sorry about this)

Their love blooms again like cherry blossoms and wilts just as fast.

It almost feels like it’s just been a dream—a brief one, that gave Daniel the hope that maybe everything would be alright after all.

The past year had been nothing but a blessing for both Daniel and Sungwoon. They had been happy—happier than they had ever been before. Their apartment comes alive again with laughter and it radiates warmth and a homely feel that wasn’t been there before.

But as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end, and this time it’s Daniel who’s the one leaving. He stares at his packed bags, wondering when things went wrong.

Again.

Heaving a deep sigh, he musters to courage to look over to where Sungwoon is sitting at the dining table, head buried in his hands.

Daniel feels pieces of his heart breaking at how small Sungwoon looks—at how  _ broken _ he looks. He wonders if this is how Sungwoon must’ve felt back when he left; he wonders if Sungwoon had also wanted go over and pull Daniel into a hug.

There’s a flood of regret that washes over Daniel. Maybe he hadn’t tried hard enough. Maybe if he hadn’t gone to that café that day, they would be alright. He wonders if they would be okay if he hadn’t accepted Sungwoon’s pleas to try again. Would they be living their separate lives, wishing each other happiness, instead of being the broken people they are right now?

It’s strange how this time around, they’re so  _ calm _ . Daniel doesn’t know if he prefers the screaming and the shouting, the breaking of the vase and the throwing of the ring to the silence they have now.

The silence that is deafening and the atmosphere that’s starting to suffocate him.

Daniel can’t breathe.

He wonders if Sungwoon can.

“I’m sorry,” Daniel says, breaking the silence. “I’m sorry, hyung.”

Sungwoon stays silent for a few seconds before raising his head. He doesn’t look at Daniel, though, and his eyes are red. Daniel hates the vulnerability that he can see in Sungwoon’s eyes.

“Don’t be.” Sungwoon’s voice is shaky from trying to hold back the tears, and he lets out a sigh as a single tear rolls down his cheeks. “Don’t be sorry.”

Daniel swallows. “I’m sorry.”

_ I’m sorry for falling out of love, hyung. _

“Why are you sorry?” Sungwoon asks. “I’m the one who should be sorry, Niel. I’m sorry. I guess I didn’t try hard enough.”

Whatever is left of Daniel’s heart breaks at that and he wants to cross the threshold and pull the elder in for a hug and promise him that it’ll be alright—that they’ll be okay.

But he can’t, because he knows it’s not true.

Sungwoon lets out a sardonic laugh. “Ironic, isn’t it? I was the one who left in the first place, and now here I am, hoping that you won’t go.”

_ Hoping that you won’t leave me. _

“I love you, you know,” Sungwoon says, and it sounds like a simple statement rather than a declaration of love. “I’ll always love you, I think.”

Daniel is silent, and Sungwoon finally looks at Daniel in the eyes.

“What about you?” he asks, though he knows the answer. “What about you, Niel?”

_ Do you still love me? _

“I loved you more than anything in the world, hyung,” Daniel says quietly, and Sungwoon doesn’t miss the way he says this in past tense. “I loved you more than my life.”

_ But things change, and people change. _

Sungwoon closes his eyes, and the tears he’s tried so hard to keep back fall down like raindrops rolling down the windows on a stormy day.

“Is it him?” Sungwoon asks brokenly.

Daniel is silent and Sungwoon gets his answer.

“Does he make you happy?” Sungwoon closes his eyes and swallows, forcing his voice not to break. 

_ Does he love you the way I do? _

“Yes,” Daniel answers in a whisper.

_ He does. _

“Okay.” Sungwoon lets out one final, broken sigh and opens his eyes. He look at Daniel directly in the eye and smiles. “Okay.”

_ I’m glad. _

**Author's Note:**

> [twitter](https://twitter.com/iridescent__ong) | [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/gyulhyuck)


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